I am EMO

What is emo? It is short for emotional. Fourfa.com defined emo as a broad title that covers a lot of different styles of emotionally-charged punk rock. Wikepedia.com defined emo as a genre of music that originated from hardcore punk and later adopted pop punk influences when it became mainstream in the US.

History of emo was discussed in different variations but it has its common denominator that it started from hardcore. In mid 1980's it was defined as sub-genre of hardcore punk (Wikipedia). In the later years, the term emocore was used, short for emotional hardcore. Some of the bands in this genre are: One Last Wish, Embrace, Fire Party and Moss Icon. Popular bands today were described as emo although they are playing different style from the former emo bands. Most of them today are My Chemical Romance, Fall Out Boy, Alesana, Paramore, Saosin and our very own Typecast.

Emo is not only related to music but also with fashion. It is easily determined who emo's are. They are recognizable with skinny jeans, tight shirts, black Converse shoes or skate shoes such as Vans, and the hair is one-sided bangs covering one eye. Emo has gone through a lot of criticisms and is associated with suicide also. Wikepedia gives a lot of explanation of emo and how suicide is associated with this genre. Moreover, emo is used to define one experiencing great depression and prefers most of the time to be alone and spend it with hardcore music that explains how the person feels towards the situation.

Many have been expressing contradictions with emo. But like the many genres we have in the music industry, the bottomline is we have our own way of expression and that includes fashion, which comes along with our own way of attacking depression.

Emo continues its way to the mainstream influencing many. It has carved its genre with the music industry as well fashion. Moreover, its identity has kept its place in the music world.

Broken Sonnet

And now I concede on the night
Of this fifteenth song
Of melancholy, of melancholy
And now I will admit in this fourth line
That I love you, that i love you

I don't care what they say
I don't care what they do

Cause tonight I leave my fears behind
Cause tonight I'll be right at your side

The clock on the TV says 8:39 p.m.
It's the same, it's the same
And in this next line I'll say it all over again
That I love you, that i love you

I don't care what they say
I don't care what they do

Cause tonight I leave my fears behind
Cause tonight I'll be right at your side
Lie down right next to me
Lie down right next to me
And I will never let go, will never let go

I leave my fears behind
Cause tonight I'll be right at your side
Lie down right next to me
Lie down right next to me
And i will never let go, never let go

But still I see the tears from your eyes
Maybe I'm just not the one for you

I was listening to Hale's Broken Sonnet, one of my favorite songs. The theme of the song caught my attention and loved it. This was the first song Hale released and became one of the loved songs of the Pinoys. This song is self composed by Champ (vocals) together with the band. The lyrics is originally a sonnet they created but it was broken since a sonnet should be composed by 14 lines but this is 16. This where they got the title Broken Sonnet.

Loving someone is one great success of existence as human, for in loving you feel a lot of emotions, the happy, sad, disappointed, overwhelmed, and hurt. In loving you offer yourself, your whole self, and be the best person that you can be for the one you love. Of course loving is a give and take process; you love and you deserve to be loved. But sometimes in loving we forget ourselves that we feel pain. Sometimes its enough for us that we love more than what the person can do for you in return. In loving we risk. We fear of the pain but yet we still love. The pain make us numb of everything.

Pain, pain, pain, was it all worth? We feel hurt. The sad thing about it is that the person who hurt you is the same person that would make you happy. I don't care what they say, 'coz tonight I leave my fears behind. 'Cause tonight I'll be right at your side. Lie down right and I never let go. I love you.

It's all because of loving someone who could not love you in return. You took the risk, but is it worth risking for?

I've been in such. I took the risk and accepting the fact that he can never love me back the way I do and I can never have him. I loved him with all my heart. I showed love in the best way I can. He knew how much I love him. We've been together by a year and nine months. But still I see the tears from his eyes and maybe I'm not just the one for him. The pain I've been keeping for so long ended me deciding to let him go. I still love him that much though.


Its hard to let go when you mean please stay. But I have to save myself before time would come that I'll be losing myself. Courage they say. Letting go of the one you've been holding on. Really its hard. I miss him a lot.


I want to have him back it can never be.

Wilma

I was I guess 4 or 5 years old when I first met her. Me and my family are having vacation here in Albay before since we were living in Manila. After few years, we returned here for good. We've been good friends for long. She was my tita but we called ourselves cousins since were on the same age.

We went to the same elementary school and separated during high school. During secondary schooling we still seek to have time to talk and chat every afternoon. But whatever happens we always have the chance to see each other since our house house is just beside hers. College years came when we seldom saw each other. There would come a time that I haven't seen her in a month.

Year 2007 came. First quarter of the year, her father died. I remembered during her father's wake I was rushed to the hospital with her kuya carrying me on his arms to the tricycle. (Too much of my hospital emergency, it was just dysmenorrhea). Just on the same year, her mother passed away, leaving her, with her kuya, and younger brother, and our family. It was not easy for her since she was suffering from illness at that time. She even failed to attend the burial of her mother.

After the loss of her parents, we moved on and took care of her. Subtlety, my cousin is getting worst. She was diagnosed with lupus. We are not well to do in life to help her with medications. We seek help from DSWD and PCSO, but funds are going to zero. The two institutions are of great help, but really we have to accept the fact that it is not enough.

She then decided to took her out of the hospital and prefer to stay home. She is getting worst. I can only see her once in a while. I can't afford to see her. I pity her a lot.

It was October 28 I think when she had she can't bear it anymore. And we have accepted it that she have to rest with our Creator. But she resisted, she stayed up to November 8, 2 days before her 21st birthday.

On the 8th of November will be her first year death anniversary. One year of not seeing her.

Dear Wilma,

Wherever you are we will never forget you. You know how much we love you. For all my shortcomings I ask my apology. I wish you are happy with Tita Glo and Tito Ader, and with our Creator there. Please guide us especially Wally and Wilmor.

Wilma, we are missing you and we love you always.

BU- CENG: BUhay CENG

BUCENG - an acronym for Bicol University College of Engineering. It is where the barbarians go - its how students from other BU unit call us. This is where students go to school in shorts, flip flops, long hair, drunk, smoking cigars in school with the proffesors, in short its atmosphere seems suited for a happy go lucky student. The way it looks and its location adds factor to its barbaric aura. But have they seen and known what's behind this scene? Let me tell my story as a true blooded CENGian.

It was 2003 when I decided to took an Engineering course. I enrolled BS in Civil Engineering in this institution thinking that this would be an easy course for me. I met new friends to keep, new challenges , and new environment. This is where I learned that student life is not always in the same color. Life in BUCENG is as colorful as the color wheel, there is dakness and brightness.

First semester of my first year came too fast. It was fun field with good experiences like having a circle of friends and joining the Pep Squad Competition in which we are the champion. Its like a passing wind when second semester came in. This is when I experienced failing, a grade of 5.0 for Analytic Geometry under the late Engr. Mantes. So to cope with the failing mark I have to enrol for summer class.

Second year came and thought that it would not happen again, but history repeats itself. And I have to accept that it is my fate or I just failed to be a faithful student. Third year, fourth year, fifth year, full or ups and downs, darksness and brightness.

March 2008 seems to be a short walk for us. Its time to say goodbye to classmates and friends and to my "tropa". I have to face BUCENG alone.

Reminiscing the memories we had in CENG I decided to share it with you. Life in BUCENG is not always as what others see on us. It is not always full of smiles and laughs. Every semester a lot of tears fall and a lot would just smile. The bottle of liquor and the boxes of cigars are your friends thru thick and thin, and God is your recourse when your down. I use to say the saying, "Ang di madala sa santong paspasan, nadadala sa santong dasalan." A CENGian knows how to go to the church and pray novena especially before every semester would end.

It is not always a happy-go-lucky life especially when you have to meet deadlines for projects take home exams, compilation of solved problem, assignments, design, plates, research work, and feasibility study. I remember we would always discuss on taking a bath or not after spending the whole night with these papers without sleeping.

You may see us strolling the whole semester but behind that strolls are bundles of projects to finish. Professor not coming in in the class but will see you on finals for the submission of project.

This I may see is a little of my story in BUCENG. Soon I will be leaving this school and I will always bring the memories I had in here.

BU-CENG: Buhay CENG.